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After a few minutes of this, you are transported to gay bars lovejoy georgia dimension of pure homoerotica. You swim through the air with your two nude male assistants, gay cowboys fuck in barn follow beside you and recline into various sexy positions. The three of you fight off hordes of tiny chariots filled with naked men, rocket-powered dildos with naked men barrn from them and giant naked men using other giant naked men as pogo sticks.

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Let me try to paint this baby-oil massage of a mental picture: The first boss gay cowboys fuck in barn a monstrously huge man wearing a metal sphere for a codpiece.

As you blast it, a second phallic-shaped man comes out of his crotch and tries to jab you with his stretching penis-arms and penis-head. While this is all going on, humpy jazz music is being mixed with the sounds of a woman panting.

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That sound you're hearing is probably you screaming, either from homophobic panic or from someone putting things up your ass. The game itself isn't that hard if you know what you're doing. The only tough part is keeping your hand-eye coordination gay cowboys fuck in barn things like a severed head riding a penis tries to kill you. ruck

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If you lose, one or both of your naked men fall in love with the stage boss. Plus, even if you're terrible at it, and can't unlock the later, gayer levels, the game's intro features all the grinning, posing naked men you could ever want.

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gay cowboys fuck in barn It's not the worst shooter ever made, but it is the worst shooter to advocate putting your mouth on a man's asshole, and that's a good way for an impressionable kid to catch bafn. You control two naked women who run back and forth trying to catch falling semen in their mouth.

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You might ask why someone would do something like that. Well, the manual says that each drop of this stranger's seed "could have been a famous doctor or lawyer.

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Also, if someone is masturbating off a roof onto people's heads, chances are he's not the best gene stock. There's something non-erotic about skipping past the courting, past the foreplay, past the actual sex and getting straight to the sperm-swallowing.

They might as well have skipped gay cowboys fuck in barn to sleeping on the wet gat.

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This game gets hard. I don't know how long this naked fruitcake on the roof has been without coitus, but his balls have a hell gay cowboys fuck in barn a lot of germ waiting to be spurted free. As the game goes on, his seed falls like the goddamn rain baarn catching all of it in your mouth requires a miracle of perversion and reflexes.

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However, for each falling wave of future doctors you manage to swallow, you're rewarded with a disgusting animation of the women licking their lips. And due to the primitive graphics of thetheir attempt at drawing lips made it look like they have full beards.

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Custer's Revenge is a dramatic historical recreation of the battle of Little Big Horn, slightly rewritten to appeal to our adult fantasies. Gay cowboys fuck in barn of being killed by the savage godless Sioux and Cheyanne Indians, Custer wades through a hail of arrows to hump a woman tied to a cactus.

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I know what you're saying: The way Custer's manhood dangles and sways in cowobys wind in perfect rhythm with his pink scarf creates an image more majestic than any Montana sky. However, the American Gay cowboys fuck in barn he's sexually assaulting sort of looks like a cocktail wienie on a toothpick.

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Concerned parents might be wondering how to explain this level of intense sexuality to your children. Well, the Custer's Revenge manual advises, "If the kids catch you and should ask, tell them Custer and the maiden are just dancing. To their credit, despite a hail of deadly arrows, they're all smiles!

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Getting across the screen to score points with your pelvis is mostly a matter of luck since if you see an arrow is coming at you, you usually can't move fast enough get out of its way. Also, cacti appear randomly to skewer your wang without warning.

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These are both formidable obstacles on your noble quest, but the real challenge must have come when Gay cowboys fuck in barn had to convince the seventh cavalry to go through with this operation.

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